Couldn't wrestle, couldn't draw - what I did to deal
A couple months ago I fractured my wrist at the tail-end of my last wrestling match. I remember it vividly; my opponent landed on me while my arm was at a bad angle. As he pins me for the count he goes "I heard a crunch. are you okay?"
I was, in fact, not okay.
As I writhed around to sell to the crowd -- as one does -- I assessed the damage. I could no longer move my fingers, my wrist flopped around. I tried resetting it in case it was just dislocated but alas, It was well and truly fucked. At that point I figured if that was going to be my last match, I might as well finish it, so I did.
I clumsily do some strikes, the heel surprises me with a cheapshot, i'm knocked out and the match ends. Curtains!
The pain didn't really set in until I got backstage. And once it did, my first thought was "well I guess I won't be drawing anymore."
A bit of backstory: I had dreamed of being a pro wrestler right out of college. However, at the time I was working as an illustrator, and was scared i'd break my fingers. There were other things too, like needing to save up money so I could fund that dream -- and for the inevitable hospital bills.
So cut to over a decade later, and i'm living my 17-year-old self's nightmare. To be honest I don't remember much after that. I knew I had a panic attack and cried for a bit. Luckily the main event came after my match and the cheers that came with it drowned out the sound.
It didn't take long for me to calm down, but throughout the ride to the hospital, the hours spent in the ER, I felt pretty resigned to my fate. I was convinced that was it; no more wrestling, no more drawing either. Thankfully that was quickly refuted by my doctor. As she wrapped my mangled wrist (which at this point I couldn't bear to look at), she explained that I suffered a distal radius fracture. I'd need to get surgery to screw a metal implant to the bone, where it'll remain for the rest of my life. I took it pretty well. I've always had bad wrists, so I figured it might even be good for me in the long run. But more importantly, she said that i'd be able to make a full recovery, mobility and all.
So that was something to look forward to! I knew for sure that i'd be able to draw long before I could train and wrestle again, so I decided to focus my energy on that. Once I had the surgery and the nerve blockers wore off, I tried moving my fingers right away. I could wiggle them a bit, and it hurt like all hell, but I felt hopeful! The following weeks were dedicated to doing all the PT exercises recommended by my doctor. Once I had the cast off, the exercises continued. Occasionally i'd remove my brace, grab a pen, attempt to draw and quickly realize that it was a dumb move. Rinse and repeat.
Eventually the pain got a little more bearable, the wrist more flexible, and somehow I was able to draw this duck:
At the time of writing, my wrist has healed significantly. I'm off the brace now too, and I'm drawing nearly every day -- more than I have in years. I've had to make some adjustments to put less strain on my wrist, like pen pressure adjustments and simplifying my workflow and style. Wrist strength hasn't fully restored yet as I struggle to put weight on it, but it's improving slowly by the day.
Does the inability to wrestle still bother me? Sometimes. The angst only really springs up when I volunteer at my promotion's shows. I think it's important to still help out however I can, but watching my peers go at it and have the time of their lives, while I can barely do a pushup frankly bums me out. So I compromise by running the ticket area, where I don't get to see the action.
There was also an instance where one of my mentors in Japan reached out to send well-wishes and invited me to return and train, which made me weepy for days.
That said, I think I'm getting by well-enough. It helps that I have an incredible support system. Well before my injury, i've consistently been in the company of my partner and close friends, playing TTRPGs, spectating Beyblade games, yapping and drawing together over overpriced matcha lattes. That never changed. So despite wrestling giving me a strong sense of purpose and identity, I know it isn't the only thing going for me. And while I slowly work towards a comeback, I'm grateful that I get to act on my reignited passion for illustration.
Thanks for reading :)